On a day like today, it can be difficult to not become consumed. Whether we realize it or not, we're all pretty obsessed with Valentine's Day. Some of us love it, some of us hate it. Some of us pretend to not care; some of us can't hide our obsession at all. But wherever you stand, it's hard to escape the constant reminders of it everywhere you go, in every store, starting on December 26th.
Why Are We So Obsessed?
People don't like to admit it --why, I don't know-- but we all want whatever it is we think "love" is. I believe that we obsess over Valentine's Day because it paints a picture of love that leads us to evaluate what we have or, probably more often, what we do NOT have. I believe this happens consciously and subconsciously; and the outcome can be either positive and/or negative. We want to know that what we have is close to that image of what seems to be perfect love. We want to know that we are loved. This evaluation can happen even if you are in a relationship (and I would bet it's more common than us married folk would like to admit).
Who Creates This Standard of Perfect Love?
I'm not here to judge, but I suspect that your answer to that question tells a lot about how you feel about Valentine's Day. It also may reveal why we believe the way we believe (again, consciously AND subconsciously) about our own situations. Most people would probably say their standard of love comes from within themselves based on their personal experience with relationships (romantic, platonic, family, etc.). That's fair, but it can be dangerous. Bottom line, believe it or not: we are all broken people. Trying to establish a standard from a broken place can create an unstable foundation. Again, I am not here to judge. I often have made terrible decisions because I set myself on something that I thought was a firm, solid belief. A lot of times, it didn't seem blatantly unstable. That's even more damaging! When things don't pose an immediate threat, we tend to settle in, but trust me, it's still effecting us subconsciously.
So what should we do then?
Stop celebrating Valentine's Day as a nation and hope our heart issues go away? Hmmm, if it were that simple. No. I'm not telling you what to do. Hopefully as I continue blogging we can figure it out together. I just wanted to point out that maybe we feel some type of way about the holiday because we don't truly know love or believe that we are loved based on whatever standard(s) we are holding ourselves up to.. Maybe we strive to go over the top with the holiday because we feel the need to constantly prove our love (or earn someone else's). Or maybe it's none of the above, and you are totally secure. That's great. I would just encourage us all to take a minute and ask ourselves why we feel as a whole and individually we are so consumed emotionally by this holiday. I also encourage you to explore Love beyond what you know (or think you know).
My belief and what I know to be true, time and time again, is that love comes from God. Also, God is love. So if I find any sense of love within me, it's because he put it there. I hope that more and more I can tap into that place. I hope that we all can find more of the mysteries of true love from that place. This is the first of many thoughts I'll be sharing about this. I hope you continue to join me as we seek to know love deeper, stronger and more fully. And as we continue to do so, I hope that any lies about love that consume us are replaced with truth and freedom.
Happy Valentine's Day!
(Yeah, I had to say it...)
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